He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
