She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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