I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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