went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
