She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
