Christians are straight up FREAKS
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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