Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
