Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
