Hey man sorry I got all grabby
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
