his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
