South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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