Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
