you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
