I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Randomize
