Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
