well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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