That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
