Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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