god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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