How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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