The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
