no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
