he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Randomize
