It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
