There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
only if we run a train.
done.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
