i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
So vagazzling was a success
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize
