Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
