just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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