I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
