If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
