dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
