I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize