alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
