oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
You are the jesus of drinking
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
