I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize