I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
