this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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