life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
it's like heaven, but drunker
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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