I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
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