Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
