If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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