this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
It's like God shit irony all over that family
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
