God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
