Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
