May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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