i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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