Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
