hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I am naked and annoyed.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
