The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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