Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
