One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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