I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
